ISO: My Cat's Soul. Last seen shortly before the arrival of Mr. Nibbles, the (apparently delectable) Guinea Pig. This formerly harmless ball of fluff and love's heart has since turned to ice. His recently soulless situation has left him with the single-minded goal of attaining enough mass to crush the roof of the aforementioned Mr. Nibbles' cage. This he plans on doing by force-feeding his unholy body with as much bargain brand kibble as it can handle. He has even taken to marking his intended prey's territory as his own by violently vomiting into the once "cozy critter" habitat. That, or his newly-acquired demonic spittle is laced with some black magic properties that I am oblivious of. Either way, the guinea's days are numbered. That's where you, the noble people of Craigslist, come in. While I can't afford a reward (you wouldn't believe what cat therapy sessions go for these days), I can promise you life-long "hero status" by my three kids, and, more importantly, the Nibbles Man himself. Sidenote: ANY cat, or, fuck it, dog soul will do. We're not picky; just desperate.
